Hi Dost's

Welcome to my 11th blog. You just reading this makes me happier than a slug that has just be sprinkled with white powder, but thankfully for the lucky mollusc, his would-be and rather blind murderer accidentally picked up sugar instead of salt! So not only did he survive from potential salty doom he received a sugary sweet snack for his troubles!

I had a cool weekend, on Saturday I drank with some cool mates that I haven't seen properly in ages. We enjoyed some fine ale in some of the top drinking holes in Croydon! It was a truly great day! On Sunday I again ran out for Milburn FC, but my 3 straight wins as a player came crashing down in front of my eyes. Milburn lost the game 1-0 to an annoying goal that happened 5 minutes from time! I was disappointed, but not disheartened as Milburn had previously lost to the same team 13-2 earlier in the season! I then went shopping with Becca and the kids to ADSA, which is quickly turning into my fave super market, yeah Tesco's, if you are hearing this, that includes you! My Sunday league footy defeat was quickly forgotten after I learnt Arsenal had beaten Liverpool 3-0, and Tottenham had lost to Reading, oh bliss! MOTD2 was a real joy to watch that evening and I feel my wide grin could be compared largely to a Cheshire cat high on helium and happy pills!

Can I also take this opportunity to congratulate Dan (Becca's brother) on his recent Graduation and finding a cool new job. I am sure I speak on behalf of all my blogger friends when I say well done!

Anyway please allow me to move onto my regular blog features as I truly have more to cram in than a tram that goes from Wimbledon to New Addington during rush hour (speaking from past experiences, this is made 100 times worse when you are wedged near a greasy mans arm pit, where he somehow decided to wear a sports vest, with his hairy and sweaty arm pit on full show!)

Business Tips for the Big Boys (all for little more than a t-shirt) (BTFTBBAFLMTATS for short)

With no further emails from Nescafe regarding my thriller advertising idea I looked at emailing my next big company, I decided to grab the bull buy its red horns and email Red Bull. Finding initial contact information for Red Bull proved difficult, I looked at their numerous websites and found only a few email contacts, I only obtained a large database of emails after I stumbled across the Red Bull music academy website, where they were literally giving email contacts away! I sent the following email to Red Bull:

"Dear Ariane

I am huge fan of your energy drinks, when I am feeling like a zombie I always grab a Red Bull can to feel revitalised again, but I am not here to only talk about my drinking habits, I am mainly emailing you guys because I have a potential advertising idea you guys might be interested in launching.

I feel you could play on your name 'Red Bull' and launch a made up advert launching a make believe product called 'Blue Haddock'. The advert will use the same animation technique you have used in your current Red Bull adverts, this will confuse consumers into believing there is a rival product hitting the market, and I am sure they will glued to their screens. The advert would start as follows;

A man is stranded on a boat far from sea, he looks hungry, thin and quite frankly doomed, but he remembers he bought an energy drink, but when he is searching for his Red Bull he realises he accidentally purchased a 'Blue Haddock' energy drink instead by mistake (the Blue Haddock drink can could look very similar to a Red Bull can). He shrugs his shoulder and drinks it, but instead of gaining wings, he gains gills.

The following slogan could then hit your screens:

Blue Haddock Gives You Gills!

The man would shrug his shoulders and dive into the sea and quickly gets swallowed by a giant squid. The advert would then show the final slogan:

Don't Be A Haddock, Gain Wings, Not Gills With Red Bull!

This advert would highlight that Red Bull should be your only choice when choosing your energy drinks. I feel its takes a clever swipe at all these silly rival energy drinks, which quite frankly taste like sea water!

Anyway let me know what you think about my adverting idea. If you would like to take this idea further please email me on: agwallett@googlemail.com.

To help spread the word of Red Bull further could I be really cheeky and ask for a free Red Bull T-shirt or any other freebie? Anything would be very much appreciated, and if you send me a t-shirt I will proudly walk around and be your free walking billboard. Please send any items to the following address: --> --> --> -->
Adrian Wallett
*********
*********Croydon
Surrey
*******

If this email finds its way to the wrong department, could you please forward it onto the Red Bull marketing department or anyone else who might be interested.

Kindest Regards
Adrian Wallett
Email: agwallett@googlemail.com"

It took a while to receive any replies other than automated out of office replies as shown below:

"I will be out of the office starting 10/09/2006 and will not return until11/10/2006.While I am out of the office, I will have limited email and voicemailaccess. However, I will get back with you as soon as possible.Thank you!"

I was disappointed because Nyla Wilkins Hassell didn't keep her promise and didn't get back to me as soon as possible, as she has had over 2 days since returning to her office and yet I still haven't received a reply from her! The same can be said of Sergi Noe as shown below:

"I will be out of the office starting Fri 10/27/2006 and will not returnuntil Thu 11/09/2006.I will respond to your message when I return."

Again another Red Bull S******, he hasn't replied upon his return to his office, although I can't too angry at old Sergi, as he does quite possible have the coolest name ever!

These initial automated emails certainly didn't get my heart pumping, I was disappointed and slightly angry at why I had wasted so much energy on emailing an energy drink company, who didn't even have enough energy to email me back regarding my new energy drink advertising idea. I needed to be recharged and finally I received an email that almost sent electric volts down my spine:

"Hi Adrian,Thank you for your e-mail and for your interest in Red Bull.Red Bull advertisements are used world wide therefore we tend to use fairy tales and myths because they are universally known, recognised and understood. We then alter them slightly to convey the Red Bull message. They have been very successful in the past (even winning awards for the brand.)We use cartoons because they help create polarity between our 2 images: the can itself and the character Mr Red Bull. Mr Red Bull is used on all trade advertising (although not on the TV and cinema advertising.)Most people usually ask us why we do not use extreme sports to advertise our brand considering the fact that our brand is firmly rooted in the lifestyle of extreme sports and we sponsor athletes in this area exclusively. Again it is a matter of polarity. We don't want to push ourselves in everyone's face saying "hey these cool athletes use it so you should to.." We prefer the consumer to make up there own minds about Red Bull rather than throwing lots of information at them. If a consumer wants to find out more about a product then with a little bit of investigation they can.Best regardsLeila GhazaiRed Bull Company Ltdhttp://www.redbull.co.ukhttp://www.redbullkeepmeposted.co.uk"

Err…ok then, not exactly the reply I expected! I think Leila must have read into my advertising idea and somehow sensed I urged them to use athletes to sponsor their drinks, where I had never mentioned sports once in my email! Very weird, I reckon every member of staff at Red Bull is forced to drink Red Bull 24/7 maybe from water dispensers that are replaced with the energy drink, and they reply to emails with so much energy and zing and enthusiasm that they don't even read the emails properly, almost liked caffiened up, impatient kids high on sugar and buzzing around the office like blue arsed flies not sure whether they are coming or going! Anyway I did appreciate Red Bulls email especially the following quote:

"We don't want to push ourselves in everyone's face saying "hey these cool athletes use it so you should to..."

I have to say it was fascinating learning how they approach their target market and not appear too pushy! They are trying to keep a cool image without trying too hard, like a mysterious teenager that wears shades even at night, leaning against a stone wall smoking a fag. Well I wanted to extinguish Red Bulls cigarette and get to the bottom line, so I replied back to Leila with the following email:

"Dear Leila

Thank you for replying to my advertising idea, however I don't really feel you really replied to the actual crux of my email; my actual advertising idea. Don't get me wrong, It was great to learn more about the thought process that goes into creating Red Bull adverts, and I am a big fan of your quirky and cool cartoon adverts.

My advertising idea didn't suggest extreme sports could be used as a potential marketing angle, on the contrary I kept your same cartoon formula, as the old saying so aptly puts it; if it ain't broke, don't try and fix it! Anyway please again look at my idea and use at your free will. I wont be causing a stink in the courts with lawyers and fat cats if you do use my idea, all I ask for in return is a simple Red Bull t-shirt.

So could I still be cheeky in asking for a free Red Bull t-shirt? As stated before I am a fan of your drinks and would proudly be your walking billboard, please send any goodies to:

Adrian Wallett
**********
********
Croydon
Surrey
*******

Thanks again for the reply to my email, I am very much looking forward to your follow up reply.

Kindest Regards

Adrian Wallett"

I am still awaiting my follow up reply and will continue this riveting story if and when it is required (basically in my next blog, if I receive any more Red Bull emails).

Number 11 Fact Heaven

To celebrate my 11th blog I will be starting a new blog feature (taking over for a short time, my krazy and random facts), aptly named: Number 11 Fact Heaven, where I will be offering a fact that is related to the glorious blog number, so today the number eleven gets the spotlight!

Because eleven is the first number which cannot be represented by a human using his or her ten fingers, it is often considered a mysterious number!

This fact doesn't offer too much information but is still pretty fascinating! I reckon anything that can't be added up using your fingers is either evil or wrong. How crazy would the world be though if we made the numbers 0-10 the only ones that could be used by law? Would the world adopt harmony and easy thinking or chaos and nuclear war? I feel it could swing either way!

BONUS Celeb Email Challenge FEATURE!

In my last blog I emailed Milburn, an upcoming Sheffield Indie band, who shared the same name as my Sunday League football team, I basically asked them to sponsor my new team. I am afraid to report I haven't received one reply from the band, I imagine they are too busy drinking Red Bull and trying to act mysterious and cool. I am secretly quite pleased, as sponsorship at Sunday League level is taking things a little too far in our already corporate run world of ours! Thank god there aren't any bozos about trying to spread their marketing ideas on the already fat cats of the business world!

To continue my feature of emailing celebrities I decided to contact the spoon bending master mind that is Uri Geller. This email is also quite poignant as the number 11 appears many times, which also fits in well with my 11th blog. I emailed him the following message:

"Dear Uri

Firstly I would like to say I am a huge fan of your work and people like you help everyone open up their minds to new ideas, thoughts and theories which they would normally discard without giving a second thought.

I am mainly emailing you regarding my recent experiences with 11:11. After listening to Want One by Rufus Wainright I instantly fell in love with one particular song simply titled 11:11. The fact I even heard this song is a bit of a mystery as I never remembered uploading the Rufus Wainright album onto my iPod. To be honest I did upload some new music from my brother's iTunes, but I am 100% sure I didn't select Rufus Wainright, who I had never heard of before. It was only when I was on a train journey up to see my family when I looked carefully through my iPod I discovered I had 3 tracks from Rufus Wainright, the 1 st track I didn't really like, but I kept listening until 11:11 played. I instantly fell in love with the simple song. I loved how the song picked up on such a mundane subject as 11:11 on a clock and based a whole song around it. At this time I had no idea 11:11 seemed to hold any significance whatsoever. What is really baffling me though, Is now I seem to see 11:11 all the time. When I have a lie-in during the weekends more often than not I wake up at 11:11 a.m. and when I go to bed and grab my phone 11:11 p.m. seems to appear.

Do you have any ideas why I might be seeing all these 11:11 signs all of a sudden? It all seems to start from listening to that track. Have you heard 11:11 by Rufus Wainright, if you haven't please purchase his album as it really is a good listen.
Any reply would be very much appreciated and good luck with everything.

Kindest Regards

Adrian Wallett"

This 11:11 experience isn't uncommon, apparently other people have noted that they see the time 11:11 more often than not. Uri Geller talks a lot about the magic off 11:11 on his website (please see the following URL for an exact link: http://www.uri-geller.com/articles/11.htm). Uri Geller urges all of us fellow 11:11 freaks to say a prayer as shown below in one of his inspirational quotes:

"When I see the number 1111: I pray for sick children and world peace, the prayer takes a moment but it's very powerful. Please if you can do the same I believe it helps!!!!"

The story I told in my email to Uri is true, and like I said in my email please try and hear 11:11 by Rufus Wainright, even if you fall into the 11:11 trap like me, it is worth it I swear!

I am sad to report so far, that Uri hasn't replied to my email yet. I will keep bending my spoons to he replies!

Random Rocky Quote:

Clubber Lang was the complete opposite of Rocky Balboa in many respects, he was bullish, straight talking and thought only for one person, himself. This classic quote from Rocky 3 really sums up the man of little words:

Interviewer: Do you hate Rocky? Clubber Lang: No, I don't hate Balboa. I pity the fool.

At least he was being honest, although he truly had egg on his face after Rocky pummelled him after their classic rematch. I often wonder what Clubber Lang did after his infamous defeat at the hands of the Italian Stallion. I hoped he followed his heart and created a team of wrongly accused criminals that went out to help people in dire needs of help and caught a sudden fear of flying!

Well that's end of another blog, thanks again for reading. You are a true star. Feel free to leave a comment, subscribe if you haven't already and generally keep happy!

YOU ROCK DOST

Adriano